Set ‘em up. Knock em down, oh, never mind.
I have no quantifiable evidence of this at all, so I’m just going to say it. Bowling is bouncing back.
That fact, if it is a fact, offers a unique opportunity for Clinton. We have a bowling alley. As best I remember, it’s owned by somebody in Connecticut, and since we are not Greenville, we don’t have bowling. Even though, we have a bowling alley.
A church in Lydia Mill bought it, gutted it and turned it into a church building.
As everyone knows, there’s nothing to do in Clinton. So a bowling alley - if it were open and operational, and if everybody could go there and get along with each other - could go a long way toward remedying Clinton’s main problem. Did I say, there is nothing to do in Clinton.
Greenville just got another bowling alley. It’s one of those boutique bowling alleys - I know this because Fox Carolina told me so on June 5. Here’s their publicity: “Stone Pin Company opened its doors along East Stone Avenue Monday night, inviting visitors to take a few rolls at this boutique-style alley.
The new alley features live music, a lounge area and bar and an upscale menu. Stone Pin Company is open seven days a week and is located in the basement of Revel Event Center.”
I know that bowling is bouncing back because I see it in commercials. Companies are desperate to attract the key demographic (18-35 years old) so their ads show the stuff that these people are into - not drugs, and stuff like that, but the other stuff.
Stuff like bowling.
Watch some commercials some time. Turn off Netflix. Stop DVRing and scrolling through commercials and you, too, will see bowling. Not your mom’s and dad’s bowling - flashing lights and disco ball bowling.
Cool bowling. Not leagues - they’re dying according to the interweb - but really fun bowling.
Plus, when I Googled “bowling making a comeback,” there is verification from bowlingballexchange, bowlingthismonth, hooplanow, hubpages, and The Honolulu Advertiser. There’s something called WT(bad word)should I do with my life? and it says, “Open a bowling alley.”
The people who owned the bowling alley in Clinton should have given over its management to an entrepreneur class at Presbyterian College. They could have come up with some cool stuff. It would take money, there would have to be a rap-ready sound system, flashing lights, a new ball retrieval thing to replace what’s probably something out of the 1940s that in there now.
Wednesday night could have been Beers & Bowl Night. All the old people will be in church. Young people only - a mix of Chance the Rapper and Dos Equis.
Monday and Tuesday could have been old people’s bowling nights. Everybody knows the weekend doesn’t get started until Thursday, the pre-weekend pre-party. Friday and Saturday could have been Big Bowl Nights, and Sunday it would have closed (except for reasonably-priced private parties).
Clinton High School could have had a bowling team. Too bad the best bowler in the school just graduated.
The ex-bowling alley is across the street from Bell Street School, where CC4Y and the Empowerment Centre are having their summer activities. Empowerment Centre people could have run the place in the daytime - CC4Y kids could have busted a few frames a couple of hours a day. They might even have gotten good at it.
Ah, the “could haves.” Surely we would have found a way to mess it up. But, while it lasted, won’t it have been a pin-bustin’ good time.
(Vic MacDonald, editor of The Clinton Chronicle, is not a bowler; but he can take good pictures of bowlers. Contact him at 833-1900 or e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org.)